Manage Stress by Redefining It!
By now, we’ve all seen the statistics behind stress and our health and longevity. We know that stress is not good for us, and we probably know a million ways to relax (not that we do it with success). But have you ever thought about how absolutely huge the word “stress” is, and how it covers a crazy amount of situations? Are all of these situations really “stress”? Because if they are, we are pretty much screwed. LOL Let’s dig in a bit, and try to redefine “stress” to something that is more manageable.
We can all relate to having a moment where our heart races and we feel dizzy, our thoughts temporarily scattered. Maybe we’re late to something, or we realize we forgot something behind. We often call these moments “stressful”. But do you notice how body reactive these types of moments are? It might more accurate to use more body-centered words such as “nervous” or “fight-flight”.
“Stressed” is also a word for when our calendar is too full, or when our day offers us very few moments of rest, or when our to-do list is crazy long. But note that each of these examples are specific to time and work load, so it might be more accurate to use a term that points at the source. For example, “swamped” or “tied up”. We also typically use “stressed” to describe the days leading-up to something that we are preparing for or working hard towards. This is also specific to time and work load, but in a different way. “Anticipitory” or “expectant” might be more accurate than “stressed”.
We also use the word “stressful” when describing a mess up. We might have that stomach sinking feeling for the rest of the day. It might keep us up that night, as we replay it over and over in our mind. But really, these thoughts are more about how we might have been perceived by others. “Embarrased” or even “shame” might be more accurate.
We can also use the word “stressed” to downplay situations that may actually require therapy, such as “trauma” or “anxiety”.
So where does this leave us? Eckhart Tolle, author of The Power of Now, defines stress as, “when you want to arrive at your goal more than you want to be doing what you are doing”. In other words, it’s how we feel when those inner voice thoughts try to convince us that life would be so much better if… or life will be better when… “Stress” is when we are not present enough in our life to catch the small, joyous moments. It’s when we are not aware enough to notice the tiny moments that are worth savoring for a second or two. Stress is what we do when life is passing us by.
The good news is, this newly redefined stress is so much more manageable!!! We don’t need expensive spa days and hours of me-time to become more present in our life. We don’t need perfect lives, free of nervousness, expectance and embarrassment. We just need a few minutes here and there for mindfulness, like breathing or a 5 minute nature walk or 3 minutes in an empty room. A mindfulness practice to realign, steady your needle, remind yourself of your true north. A reminder what you have to be thankful for. Presence over perfection.
Until next time,
Laura
